Desire and the Slippery Slope - Va'etchanan 5784

 Is it so terrible if I want something that you have?  What would happen if a poor person walks past a mansion and wistfully wishes they could live there?  In the Parsha this week, we read Moshe’s recounting of the giving of the Ten Commandments at Mount Sinai.  In his account, Moshe elaborates a little on the way it was written the first time.  

The tenth commandment is “Lo Tachmod” - do not covet.  As usual the English language struggles to accurately translate the Biblical Hebrew words.  We associate the word covet with desiring someone else’s things.  But the definition of “covet” according to Jewish law is to take an action to get something that someone else has.

For example: if someone has an item that you like and you ask them to sell it to you and they refuse.  You offer them more money, and perhaps give them an offer they can’t refuse.  When the transaction happens and you purchase the item, even though you paid for it very well, that is a transgression of the Tenth Commandment - an action based sin.  What is so bad about that?

In the retelling of the Commandments, Moshe clarifies that it goes a step further.  In addition to Lo Tachmod, there is the prohibition “Lo Titavve” - do not desire.  This is a sin that has no action.  Just desiring something that belongs to someone else is forbidden.  Seems to be a pretty high standard, yet it is one of the Ten Commandments that, like all the Mitzvot, applies to everyone.  So why is it so terrible if I like your item or your house and wish it was mine?

On a basic level, we can understand this as a slippery slope.  First I desire it, then I try to buy it from you and covet it.  If you refuse to sell it I might be tempted to steal it, and if you catch me stealing it I might get into a fight with you and kill you.  I know it sounds a little far-fetched, but the slippery slope is a real issue.  As our Sages say (Talmud Shabbat 108b), that is the profession of the evil inclination - today it says do this and tomorrow it says do that, and eventually it says: go worship idols.  

But there is another way to look at it.  The desire itself is a problem.  If we go through life trying to accumulate things, we are always looking at what others have.  If we recognize that each of us is a unique part of Hashem’s plan for the world, it completely changes our outlook on life and the meaning of possessions.

Every individual has a purpose that fits into Hashem’s overall plan.  A good employer does not hire redundant employees, how much more so the Creator of everything.  Each and every person has their mission, using their Divine soul - the spark of Hashem within us, and their “animal” or natural soul that animates the body, their body and what is referred to by our Sages as each person’s “portion of the world.”  Hashem gives each of us everything that we need for our unique mission.  Everything I own, everything that comes my way, is one of the tools Hashem provided me for my mission.

Some of us have more resources and some have less.  One person is a great salesperson or business owner and another is a scholar, an artist or a teacher.  One person shares their life with this spouse and another with a different spouse.  All of this is by Divine Providence, in order to ensure that each person can fulfill their niche in Creation.  If something is owned by someone else, it is not part of my mission, unless circumstances send it my way.  

When we recognize this truth, we accept our lot in life with joy and are satisfied with what we have.  It also brings us gratitude for having everything we need for a meaningful life.  As soon as we look at what someone else has as something we need, we begin to resent our place in Hashem’s plan, resent what others have, and constantly feel as if somehow we are shortchanged.

A young boy recently opened his heart to me.  A relative of his, only a few years older, has set up a budding (after school) teen business that is going well.  This young boy was troubled.  Look at how successful he is and I can’t do anything.  He happens to have a brilliant, sharp mind and is far ahead of any kids his age in studying and grasping things.  I explained to him that everyone has their own talents from Hashem for us to use in our way, and to never try to be someone else.  I was gratified to see this resonate with this eight year old, and he was truly grateful for the perspective.  

Hashem doesn't make mistakes.  If I have something, it’s mine to use for good.  That includes talents, abilities and material goods.  If I don’t have it, it is for someone else to use.  A key to a happy and fulfilling life.