Never Satisfied- Behaalotcha 5784

Moshe, the great leader, the man of G-d, throws up his hands in despair. 

He had brought ten plagues on the Egyptians and freed the Jews. He had split the sea and brought, as we say in the Haggadah, another 50 plagues on the Egyptians at the sea. 

When there was no food he provided miraculous Manna from Heaven every day for the entire nation. When there was no water he hit a rock and great streams of water poured forth, irrigating the desert wherever they traveled. 

It was dangerous in the desert. Extreme heat and cold, with poisonous snakes and scorpions.  Clouds miraculously surrounded them and they spent 40 years in a safe cocoon. The clouds even absorbed the arrows and rocks that the Egyptians had shot at them on the way to the Sea of Reeds. 

Now the people asked for meat, and the great Moshe was helpless. “From where do I have meat to give to all these people,” he cries out to Hashem. And after Hashem says he will provide meat for them for a month he says: “Will enough sheep and cattle be slaughtered for them, or will all the fish of the sea be gathered for them and be enough for them?”

“I can’t carry the burden of all the people by myself, if you do this to me please kill me.”  Such despair from a man whose every move was purely in service to Hashem and the people, because they asked for meat. 

How could Moshe question if Hashem had enough meat for them?  Could it be that he suddenly lost his faith in Hashem?  What does “from where do I have meat” mean?  From Hashem, of course, just like heavenly bread, water and clouds!

The question is actually deeper, in light of Moshe’s previous reactions to the people’s inappropriate behavior. When they worshiped the Golden Calf 40 days after receiving the Torah, and Hashem threatened to destroy them, Moshe prayed for them. When they had no drinkable water and complained, Moshe cried out to Hashem for them. Every time they messed up, Moshe stood up and interceded with Hashem on their behalf. What changed?  Why give up now?  

I want to briefly answer these questions on two levels - mystical and psychological. Chassidus explains that Moshe’s question “from where do I have meat” is based on his spiritual greatness. (This is just a very brief summary that requires more study.) Everything in this world has a spiritual source. Bread is rooted in Chochma - the first of the ten divine Sefirot, and meat in Binah, a lower spiritual level. Moshe’s soul was from Chochma, and bringing meat to the people was not in his spiritual sphere. Hashem therefore told him to ordain the 70 elders, whose souls were from Binah, and who would therefore relate spiritually to the miracle of providing meat. 

The question of whether there will be enough sheep, cattle or fish to provide the people’s needs is not, G-d forbid a lack of faith, nor is it a question of quantity. When the people had no food Moshe dealt with their hunger by providing Manna. When they were thirsty, he responded to their legitimate need for water, and asked Hashem to provide it despite the negative way in which they approached the request. 

But the request for meat was different. They had heavenly food every day that miraculously tasted like anything they wanted it too, with a few exceptions like garlic and onion. The people were complaining that the texture of the Manna was not the same as the real food, and they missed the seasonings they were used to in Egypt. 

Here they were, Hashem’s chosen people who had each personally experienced the Divine revelation at Sinai, who were steeped in Torah and holiness in preparation for the mission of transforming the world, eating miraculous, spiritual food designed to lift them to the greatest spiritual heights, and they complained that they couldn’t experience sinking their teeth into a steak or a halibut filet. 

Moshe had devoted his life to teaching the people that true satisfaction comes from connecting to Hashem and following a holy path in life, striving to find meaning in everything we do. When the physical world is used as a tool for our mission, it feeds and satisfies us rather than becoming the focus of our desires and lust. 

Physical desires for their own sake can never be satisfied. The Talmud says that one who has 100 coins desires 200, when he has 200 he desires 400, and once he gets the 400 he now wants 800. So a person always dies with only half his desires fulfilled. 

“Will sheep and cattle be enough to satisfy them,” Moshe asks.  “Will all the fish in the sea fill their desire?”  If they have halibut they will then want salmon, the sea bass, then every other species, and they will never be satisfied. 

Yes, food is necessary and has its purpose, and there’s nothing wrong with enjoying your food, especially on Shabbat. But when the food, or for that matter any material possessions, become a means on their own, that only leads to more desire and lack of satisfaction. 

I had a friend who said: the man who dies with the most toys wins. I don’t think so. The man who dies having lived a meaningful, Torah life, using the material world to further his spiritual goals, wins.